Nectarine Wine - Final Bottle (3), December 2020 - 21st May 2021

I can't remember when exactly I opened this bottle (it was before Christmas), but it was a wine that both Claire and I rejected for being Too Nasty. Rather than do the sensible thing and pour it down the sink, I put a cork in the bottle and stored it in the porch. There it stayed until this week, and I have had a glass most nights. It is just drinkable and that is good enough for me. 

On Friday night I was very much out of sorts (see Orange 2020 for an explanation) and finished the bottle, knowing that I would wake on Saturday with a headache. I woke on Saturday with a headache.

A photo from earlier in the week. Orchestra is Back!!!

Magnolia Petal Wine 2020 - First Bottle (3), 8th-10th April 2021

Distinctly odd but (depending on who you ask) not unpleasant. If the person you ask, however, is my wife, she will tell you just quite how unpleasant it is. Claire took one sip, after a suspicious sniff, and pulled an almighty face as if I had made her drink hemlock. I asked her to repeat the process for the camera. Showing how much she loves me, she did. Thereafter the remainder of the bottle was mine.

The wine does have a strange taste - there is a bitterness that lurks below the surface and there is a hint of tea to the flavour. It is not as good as 2019's batch but I honestly don't think the wine is a disaster. Adding a dash of sugar-syrup helps. Claire has requested that I never make this again, which is a little harsh. This year's harvest has been destroyed by a late April frost and snow showers, so she is certainly safe for the time being.

Claire enjoying the wine

If you want to see how I made this wine, click here.

Strawberry Wine 2015 - Final Bottle (3), 23rd February 2021

Strawberry wine, it turns out, is not one to lie down in the cellar for years before sampling. This wine was so near to undrinkable that I poured it down the sink. It is rare, indeed, that I resort to that. The taste was cloying and unpleasant and I wonder if it was corked. I opened a bottle of Ginger instead and that was far better.

After I had poured the wine away I inspected the bottle. It was badly stained from the wine and may ultimately need to be recycled.

Little of note happened on Tuesday, but that is so often the case in these days of Lockdown. Still, the news on that front is looking more promising. We may be free to return to near-normal by July!

The empty wine bottle

Nectarine Wine - Fifth Bottle (4), 27th August 2020

This wine has not improved with keeping. Claire could not think of anything good to say about it beyond that it was not undrinkable. I decided, on the strength of this bottle, that Nectarine is not a flavour from which to make wine again. It was bland, thin, slightly bitter and not what one would look for in a white wine.

In other news, I made a quiche.

Taken on 27 August

Rhubarb Wine 2018 - Eighth Bottle (A5), 7th-9th June 2020

This bottle was opened to test a hypothesis. The last bottle we had of this vintage was rejected by Claire on her first sip with a great deal of fuss being made. I, however, thought it was fine. Therefore, I presented this bottle to Claire without reminding her of February's experience, and exactly the same thing happened. This means that there must be something in Rhubarb 2018 that Claire can taste and I cannot.

I fetched an Xmas Tutti Fruti for Claire to drink whilst I had this bottle over the next couple of nights. I must test Demijohn C!

Taken on 7 June

Another door I like

Ya Ya Pear Wine - Fourth Bottle (5), 25th-26th April 2020

I decided to open a bottle of Ya Ya Pear, mostly because Claire was out on Saturday night, waiting for samples of Covid 19 to arrive in her lab. None did, so she spent most of her time embroidering. Partly, though, I wanted to see if a gap of two and a half years had improved this wine any. It had not. The best I can say is that I did not feel an urge to pour it down the sink. There is a thin, chemical taste to it. Though I was meaning to save Claire from this wine, she did have a glass on her return and agreed that it was drinkable, but little more.

Taken on 26 April - our garden

from our bedroom window.

Xmas Tutti Fruti 2015 - Final Bottle (B6), 7th-16th May 2020

Well, this bottle hasn't improved with age. I poured us both a glass on a Thursday night and noticed that its clarity left something to be desired. The taste test failed as well: insipid with just a hint of nasty. There was virtually no flavour to it at all. Despite our increased drinking rate in this age of Covid 19 and self-isolation, it took me over a week to finish the bottle. That I drank it at all does not speak well of my discerning palate. 

Where I had lunch on 7 May

Rose Petal Wine 2018 - Fifth Bottle (A1), 26th-27th April 2020

Much worse! After being relatively pleased with the previous bottle, this one has reverted to its bitter and overly-floral self. I can't explain the difference - both bottles were from the same demijohn.

Claire was out again on Sunday night, waiting to process samples in the lab, hence opening a bottle that she doesn't much like (mind you, nor do I). Much of it, though, was drunk on Monday night while trying to watch happy things on telly to lift the mood.

A photo I took on 26th April, capturing how I was feeling

Rose Petal Wine 2018 - Third Bottle (B6), 5th December 2019

This really is a poor vintage of Rose Petal Wine. There is an overall bitterness to it and its best quality is its colour - a bronzy-pink. But praising a wine just for its colour is no praise at all. Even its clarity leaves something to be desired.

We drank the whole bottle on a Thursday night, which is never the best of ideas, but neither of us is having a great time at work. Claire's machinery keeps breaking and Christmas is always the most awful time of year for me. However hard I try, it seems that some contracts just won't exchange.

A photo I took on 7th December - so even 

more unrelated than usual.

Rhubarb Wine 2018 - Seventh Bottle (B3), 11th-16th February 2020

Claire opened this bottle because I had finished the whisky in a whisky-mac and she also wanted something to drink. Her first sip rapidly turning into gagging, which then became a stream of invective about how awful this wine was. I remember something about 'cheese' and 'sweaty men'. Personally, I thought the wine was entirely acceptable and could not see what the fuss was about. This meant I drank the bottle slowly over the next several days. Claire had one more sip some days later to see if exposing the wine to oxygen had helped. It very much had not.

A Quince Tree planted on 16th February

Strawberry Wine - First Bottle (5), 3rd-7th November 2019

It has taken us until early November to drink the first bottle from this batch of strawberry wine. This is because I stored all the bottles in the crypt and I rarely venture down there. When I opened it up to store some prune & parsnip I discovered that this bottle had popped its cork. I haven't had an explosion for years! There is no telling how long it has been open for, but we decided to drink it anyway.

Claire had a sherry-glass full and decided that this was plenty. I pretended that the wine was acceptable (it wasn't) and had two glasses. By Thursday night and another half glass, I decided that the only acceptable place for this was down the sink.

Zucchini Wine - Third Bottle (3), 10th May 2019

Well, that is another bottle down the sink. Only three left to go.

This was my comedy wine for the Kelso holiday and saved until the last night, specifically so that Ann would not have to try it. She thinks that the joke has worn somewhat thin. In fact, I think this wine has lost some if its offensiveness. Nick said that its worst crime was blandness. Wendy & Richard thought it drinkable. They were in the minority but it does solve the problem of what to do with the remaining three bottles.

The wine was poor reward for having done a 12 mile walk (advertised as 9) to the top of Windy Gyle via the Heatherhope Valley.

Exploring an Iron Age Hill Fort above Heatherhope Valley

Julia's Wines: Elderflower 1993 - 16th February 2019

It has been a long time since we opened a bottle of Julia's ancient wines. When this one was being made, I was sitting my Law Society Finals and would not meet Claire for another two years.

I took the bottle to Ros's for an evening of Board Games and hilarity, and it was appropriate that Julia was represented. The wine looked beautiful and had an attractive scent. We all raised our glasses, toasted Julia, took a sip and poured the wine down the sink. It had not aged well.

Zucchini Wine - Second Bottle (4), 17th November 2018

Oh dear, oh dear, oh dear. Zucchini Wine lost the Wine Party. Out of sixteen bottles it came sixteenth and received an average score of 0.17 out of 5. I don't think I have ever had such an unpopular wine. Some mad fool awarded it a 2, but otherwise it had a mix of 0s and -1s. Actually, Lindsay gave it a quarter of a point for being liquid. Elsewhere I got "Horrid", "What a shocker", "Bleuurk", an unsmiley face and "Smells like perm solution". I have literally no idea how to get rid of the remaining four bottles.

Z is for Zero.

People's reaction when I offer them a glass of Zucchini Wine

Whitecurrant Wine - Final Bottle (3), 17th November 2018

This bottle did not even reach an average score of 1 at my Wine Party. It got 0.48, and my specific instructions were to rate each bottle 1-5. Whitecurrant wine, though, did not come last. I see from previous posts about Whitecurrant that I opened a bottle for my Wine Party in 2014, and this proves that Whitecurrant wine is one best drunk young.

One person (and I do not know who) wrote "Startling! Kerosene, Creosote, Vinegar" and awarded it a 0. Sooz could not even bring herself to rate it and wrote "The death of angels."

W is for Worst (but for Zucchini)

Vanilla Wine - Final Bottle (1), 17th November 2018

We are into the bottom three wines for the Wine Party. This came fourteenth of sixteen, with an average score of 1.25 out of 5. It really was not a good wine (though with a dash of sugar syrup improved). Curiously, there were two people who enjoyed it - David and Anthony. Jayne, though, did not hold back on her comments: "Bloody awful. Smells bad, tastes worse and absolutely sod all like Vanilla." (I have censored the original comments for the purposes of this blog.) Two people referred to its industrial cleaner aroma, but it also got a surprising number of 3s and 4s (i.e. more than none).

V is for Vile.

Mango Wine - Final Bottle (4), 17th November 2018

Our final bottle of Mango Wine (phew!) was opened for my Alphabet Wine Party. It was in the bottom four (of sixteen) bottles and there was a huge jump between this bottle and the top twelve. It scored an average of 1.48 out of 5. The most positive comment was "Unexpectedly bland" and my favourite (from Sooz) was "There are many flavours. None of them are nice. Or mango." It is a shame, because Mango Wine should be nice. And it really isn't. It was a fabulous party, though. As ever I tried to spend time with everyone and I think I nearly managed.

M is for Musty

Zucchini Wine - First Bottle (5), 14th September 2018

I have a rule. I will not write up a bottle of wine until it is empty. I am breaking that rule. In front of me is a bottle of Zucchini Wine with only two small glasses having been taken from it. The remainder will not pass human lips (or any other species' come to that). It is foul. There is a hint of vomit to both its aroma and taste. Claire couldn't finish her glass. I manfully struggled on with mine, but only as a punishment for making the stuff in the first place. This is quite definitely the worst wine I have made for an age.

The Offending Bottle

If you want to see how I made this wine (just in case you feel like having a go, because, let's face it, why wouldn't you?) click here.

Clementine Wine - Fifth Bottle (4), 25th-29th August 2018

Claire spent the weekend in Oxford playing Ravel's String Quartet. Obviously I was going to have a bottle of wine whilst she was away, but as a loving husband I decided to open something nasty. In fact, Clementine Wine has improved from nearly undrinkable to nearly drinkable. I did not see this as a punishment (though I will still never make it again).

Bank Holiday Monday was a grand day. I took the opportunity to meet up with Vicky Butler, who kept me sane in my second year at Warwick and who I have not seen since 1994. We walked six and a half miles round Curbar Edge and it felt like only a week had gone by.

Curbar Edge, in Derbyshire

Vanilla Wine - Fifth Bottle (6), 10th May 2018

I took this bottle to Dorset with me as my 'Comedy Wine'. Rather than pouring eight glasses, one for everyone, I poured one glass instead and everyone had a sip. That was all anyone could face and this one glass was not finished. Richard said that it reminded him of something he might find in the garage, and it was agreed that it had an air of brush-cleaner to it. Overall, not a success. My fish pie, on the other hand, was a triumph.